Gilbert's 10 Favorite Songs for Geeks

There’s a scene in Why My Love Life Sucks that reveals Gilbert’s favorite kind of music. This is after Amber has turned him into a vampire, and she’s been trying unsuccessfully to get him to leave his old life and join her.

* * *

I grab my backpack, and head for the bus. I know I have to make a short detour at the school, but I can’t wait to get to Queens.

Amber meets me at the corner. I start singing, “And there’s a creepy doll, that always follows you. It’s got a pretty mouth . . .”

Amber frowns. “You make that up just now?”

“No, it’s a Jonathan Coulton song.”

“Never heard of him.” Figures. “Who else do you like?”

“Well, I . . .” Okay, obviously I can’t say any Nerdcore bands or singers, so that leaves out MC Frontalot and MC Lars. If she’s never heard of Weird Al Yankovic, the only word she’ll hear there is “weird.” She’s definitely never heard of Stephen Lynch, and if she has, she probably doesn’t find songs like “Beelz” very funny. Come on, who do I like that most people like?

Oh, I know. “I like the Barenaked Ladies.”

She scrunches up her face and crosses her arms. “Most guys do, but they don’t usually mention it when there are girls around.”

What? Oh. “No, they’re not ladies. They’re a bunch of Canadian guys.”

“And they play naked? Ewwww!”

“No, they don’t play naked. You must have heard of them. They sing the theme song to The Big Bang Theory.”

“The TV show?”

“No, the actual Big Bang. The Restaurant at the End of the Universe from Douglas Adams’s book was so successful they turned it into a franchise, and they gave the Barenaked Ladies a permanent gig there.”

She rolls her eyes and shakes her head. I keep walking, she keeps following, the song “Creepy Doll” keeps playing in my head.

* * *

So what are his ten favorite songs? It’s hard to narrow it down, but I’ll try.

1. “Creepy Doll” by Jonathan Coulton

2. “Code Monkey” by Jonathan Coulton

3. “Still Alive” by Jonathan Coulton (sung by G.L.A.D.O.S.)

4. “Goodbye, Planet Earth” by Matthew Ebel

5. “The Saga Begins” by “Weird Al” Yankovic

6. “Download This Song” by MC Lars

7. “D&D” by Stephen Lynch

8. “Always Look on the Bright Side of Life” by Eric Idle

9. “One Week” by the Barenaked Ladies

10. “The Big Bang Theory” by The Barenaked Ladies

"A quick fun read where you will get a lot of laughs..."

"A quick fun read where you will get a lot of laughs.... I cannot wait for some more Gilbert!" ~ The Next Chapter: Book Review: Why My Love Life Sucks by Shevi Arnold

To read the rest of this review, click here. 

Spiced Latte Reads: [Book Review] Why My Love Life Sucks by Shevi Arno...

"Hands down, a must read!" ~ Spiced Latte Reads: [Book Review] Why My Love Life Sucks by Shevi Arnold

Check out the rest of this awesome review!

"Being a geeky gamer person myself I totally fell in love with this book."

"Everything came together and fit perfectly into this amazingly written gem of a book. Highly recommend..."~Krystal's Enchanting Reads: {Review} Why My Love Life Sucks by Shevi Arnold

Click the link to check out the rest of this fantastic review. Thanks, so much, Krystal Willingham!

Oh, my god. Best. Book. Review. Ever.

"May I add on how much I love the cover? It is freaking fantastic! A robo-vamp? A play on words type title? EEEPPP!! Shevi, you have a new fan on your hands." ~Moka from Words Create Scenes

Oh, my god. Best. Book. Review. Ever.

Check out the rest of it here: Words Create Scenes: Why My Love Life Sucks by Shevi Arnold

"Why My Love Life Sucks is a book that from the very beginning, is engaging and enjoyable..."

"Why My Love Life Sucks is a book that from the very beginning, is engaging and enjoyable. Gilbert is so very likeable and what he has to go through is at times funny and touching.  Shevi Arnold wrote a great book!" ~ Coffee and a Book Anytime

Yes, I did write a book specifically for geeks like us. We are all Gilbert in my book, and that makes us all geeking awesome. Thanks for noticing. You rock!

You can check out the rest of this review by clicking here. 

"I am definitely adding Shevi to my list of authors to watch."

"Y'all, this book was so darn funny! I am definitely adding Shevi to my list of authors to watch." Another great review for Why My Love Life Sucks! Thank you, thank you, thank you, Dizneeee's World of Books! 

Check out the rest of this fantastic review by clicking here. 

Another Geeking Awesome Review for Why My Love Life Sucks!

"Great ball of fun with vampires wrapped up very nicely with a great cover and catching title. It is worth checking out, trust me." Thank you, Jenn Renee Read, for your review of Why My Love Life Sucks. 

You are geeking awesome, you know that, right? 

I'm so super psyched right now I could just scream... 

YayYYY!

You can read the rest of the review by clicking here.

Looking for Family Entertainment Deals in New York City? Check out These 11 Websites

New York City is one of the most amazing--and expensive--cities in the world, but deals abound if you know where to look. (Times Square in New York City, photo: Terabass)

A friend of mine from overseas will be coming to the New York City area with her family for summer vacation. We talked about it over Facetime (gotta love how Facetime can connect you with family and friends who are far away), and she told me her family wants to have a genuinely American experience. She mentioned seeing an auto race as an example.

She also said she wanted to see a Broadway show. Then we both said in unison, “But they're so expensive!”

And it’s true, they are.

But there are great deals out there if you know where to look.

For example, one year I bought tickets for the family to see Ovo by Cirque du Soleil, which is a great Cirque show. We sat only four rows from the stage, and the tickets only cost us $40 each.

Today I bought tickets for Rebounderz in Edison, New Jersey. This is an amazing indoor trampoline park that my family loves. Two tickets good for 90 minutes each were just $23. That’s $11.50 per person! Not bad.

I've also bought coupons good for discounted merchandise from some cool stores, discounted movie tickets, tickets to off-Broadway shows, like Stomp, and more.

So I compiled this list of places to look for good entertainment deals in the NYC area for my friend and her family, and I thought I’d share them here with you. 

After all, the only thing better than having a good time is having a good time at a great price. (If you're coming from overseas, be aware that you might need an American credit card to take advantage of many of these deals.)

Here's a short list of websites you should check out if you looking for entertainment deals in the New York City area:

1. Groupon

Groupon works with Expedia to bring you travel deals based on location. I bought those tickets to Rebounderz here, as well as movie tickets. It's best to subscribe a couple of months in advance, because you never know what you’re going to find.

http://www.groupon.com/new-york/getaways

 2. Goldstar 

Goldstar offers an eclectic list of events, some of them FREE, and many of them half or more off. Current examples are the Blue Man Group: Worldwide Theatre Sensation at Astor Place Theatre for $43.00-56.60 instead of $85.00 and Cirque du Soleil’s Totem for $37.00-$78.00 instead of $55.00-115.00. We've bought tickets to off-Broadway shows from Goldstar. You have to join the club to take advantage of offers, but it's free, so why wouldn't you?

http://www.goldstar.com/new-york/events

3. Living Social

Living Social deals are . . . interesting, and even more eclectic than Goldstar's. They're worth checking, though, because you never know what you're going to find: rock-climbing in Brooklyn for the kids or a pirate boat cruise for adults, who knows? It could be fun.

https://livingsocial.com/cities/231-nyc-midtown

4. Amazon Local

Did you know Amazon offers local deals? Well, now you do. There are deals for local services, activities, and products. For example, right now you can save 60% off a New York City ghost tour . . . if you dare. I wonder if my friend’s family would like that?

http://local.amazon.com/nyc-midtown/deals/all

5. School Tix

How does taking in a Broadway or off-Broadway show at a decent price sound?

School Tix has a nice selection of shows at discount prices, and you generally don't have to come with a school-age child to get these deals. Right now, for example, it’s offering Annie for $45.00-$85.00; Chicago for $49.50-$88.00; and Peter and the Starcatcher for $49-$69.

http://www.schooltix.com/

6. Theater Mania

Theater Mania also offers tickets to a nice selection of shows, on and off Broadway, at reduced prices.

http://www.theatermania.com/new-york-city-theater/discount-tickets/

7. Your Broadway Genius

Your Broadway Genius has discount tickets for Broadway and off-Broadway shows, too. The selection is small, but interesting. And I was surprised to see reduced tickets for The Ride: $50 instead of $69 (not including tips). I've always wanted to take The Ride, which is part bus tour and part musical-variety show. You sit facing the windows, while actors and entertainers perform on the sidewalks of New York City in front of your eyes. Now I’m even more tempted.  

http://www.yourbroadwaygenius.com/locations/new-york-city-discount-broadway-tickets/

8. DealCatcher

No matter what you're looking for, DealCatcher is a great place to check prices first. I usually go there to look for deals on products, but they offer activities too. I’d be particularly tempted by the Improv and comedy club offerings they have going now. (I love, love, love Improv and stand-up comedy.) DealCatcher catches deals from other websites, so if you find something you like, you might want to follow the link to the other site to see what else they have to offer.

http://www.dealcatcher.com/local/new-york

9. SlickDeals

SlickDeals is a lot like DealCatcher, but not all of their deals are the same. They're worth checking out too. And you might want to subscribe to both newsletters so that you can be aware of new deals before they're sold out.

http://slickdeals.net/localdeals/new-york/

10. TravelZoo

And finally, one of my favorite travel deal aggregators, TravelZoo, also offers entertainment deals by area. Of course, their New York City entertainment deals include Broadway, off-Broadway, and so much more, including unusual tours of the city, sport events, and activities on the water. TravelZoo is also a good place to look for travel deals near and not so near New York City.

http://www.travelzoo.com/entertainment/new-york/

Oh, and I should include this one last website just for the locals . . .

11. New York City Patch

I don't know if these exist around the country, but in this area, most communities have a Patch website with local information, such as news updates, classes, events, and much more. Here's a list of family events in the New York City area over the next few days, and most of them are free:

http://newcity.patch.com/events/category/family

__________________

I hope this helps my friend make the most of her family trip, and I hope it helps you too.

This isn't a complete list by any means, so try searching on your own. And let me know what you find. I always love learning about great deals, particularly ones my family can enjoy close to home.

ADD ON: I realized after I wrote this that I completely forgot about AAA. If you have a membership--and you should if only for the roadside assistance should your car break down in the middle of nowhere for whatever reason--you're entitled to some great discounts at theme parks, restaurants, the movies, and lots more. Here's a link that should work if you can enter the site with your membership card: http://midatlantic.aaa.com/Store/Travel/AttractionandMovieTickets For example, Hersheypark tickets, which usually cost $58.80 are just $38.00 when preordered online and shipped to you (at no additional charge).

My first street fair as a vendor!

I'll be selling my books. I'm nervous and excited about it at the same time!

The best shows you aren't watching: #1 Smash

Geek love is the greatest love of all, because a geek loves something not because others think he should but despite others telling him he shouldn't. I am a geek, and when I love something I GEEKING love something.

Now when it comes to TV shows, most of my loves are pretty standard for geeks. I love Doctor Who, Warehouse 13,  and The Big Bang Theory. (I was even the first person to write a glowing review for The Big Bang Theory on Amazon, I love it so much.) But sometimes I love things that aren't as loved as they should be. So this is going to be my list of shows I think need to stay on the air or brought back from oblivion (yes, Firefly, Eureka, you too), and I'm starting with Smash. 

The story of Smash is weak. What sells it are the awesome songs and performances that are a part of the musicals that are being produced in the story of the show. I'm going to show you two of my favorites here. It's songs like this that make me believe Smash deserves to stay on the air.

So if you like what you see, watch Smash on NBC on Saturday nights until the show ends, perhaps forever, and look up previous episodes on NBC.com.

I geeking love Smash. Weak story, but amazing songs and performances.

Today's walk

This is a picture I took on my cell phone today.It was so cold out.

100 Tips for Writers by Shevi Arnold

Want to write fiction but don't know where to begin? Here's my first of four videos on 100 tips for writers. I hope you find it useful.

You can read all 100 tips and leave your questions or comments by clicking on the "100+ Tips" tab above. 

Happy writing!

Why My Love Life Sucks Goes on an Xpresso Book Tour at the End of April!

I'm so excited. My latest novel,Why My Love Life Sucks,  is a funny story about geeks, gadgets, girls, vampires, and the most unlikely of friendships--and it will be going on an all-reviews tour at the end of April thanks to Xpresso Book Tours! 

Here are the blogs that have signed up and the dates they will be posting reviews: 

April 29th

-Jennreneereas  

-Dizneeee's World of Books

April 30th

-Coffee & A Book Anytime 

-Words Create Scenes 

May 1st

-Little Lovely Books

-wordpaintingsunlimited 

May 2nd
-The Next Chapter
-Spiced Latte Reads  

May 3rd
-Krystal's Enchanting Reads
-As Palavras Fugiram   

May 4th
-Teen Blurb

If you're one of the book bloggers who has agreed to review my latest novel, thank you! Give yourself a round of applause, because you are geeking awesome. 

If you're not, would you like to join the fun?  If this book sounds like something you might like, email me at shevia at hotmail dot com with your preferred digital format (for Kindle, Nook, Apple device, or other) before April 29th, and I will be happy to send you a free digital copy in exchange for an honest Amazon review. 

Geeking out from all this awesomeness, 

Shevi

How a Writer's Mind Works

I’ve noticed a contradiction.

On the one hand, I believe that everyone has a story worth telling. I don’t care who you are, there’s a story only you can share with the world, and the world will always be missing something if you don’t tell it. You might not know what that story is or how to tell it, but that story is there.

On the other hand, I’ve come to realize that writers are different. We don’t think the same way that other people do. John Green was on The Late, Late Show with Craig Ferguson recently, and they talked about it. (In case you don’t know, John is a bestselling writer of funny, sad, geeky, wonderful novels for teens, like The Fault in Our Stars, and Craig has written a novel, as well as an honest, funny, and moving memoir.) John pointed out that writers are always seeing the possibilities in everything, and we choose to write the possibilities that make particularly good stories. That’s very true. I know I’ve always been that way, and it makes me weird. I don’t see the world the way most people do. I don’t take anything for granted. I’m always seeing possibilities, always asking, “What if?”

So how can I believe that everyone should tell his or her story, when I also believe that there’s something about the way writers think that make us different? Not special, just . . . different?

Maybe it’s our job to show our readers the possibilities.

Maybe we need to plant questions in our readers minds that stay with our readers after the book is closed. Maybe we need to plant these questions to help our readers see the world in new ways. 

And maybe in doing so, we can hope that they too will start to see the possibilities in everything, including in themselves and the stories only they can tell. 

Taxation without Representation (Satire)

James Otis, Jr. said, “Taxation without representation is tyranny,” yet there are millions of Americans who are taxed and who receive no benefit from the taxes they pay. They aren't even allowed to vote. This, my friend, is taxation without representation, and it is tyranny!

I’m talking, of course, about the dead. 

Not only are they taxed, but they’re taxed simply for being dead. It’s true. It’s called “Estate Tax,” and it’s an outrage! How can we allow these Americans--who cannot even speak up for themselves--to be treated so unfairly under the law?

So I say, “Let’s give dead people the right to vote!” 

And when the zombie hordes come to my door in search of brains, I’m going to tell them just that. I’m going to make protest signs for them and send them to Washington, DC. 

Washington is already filled with brain dead, corporate zombies, so they should fit right in.

Want to Get Over Your Fear of Public Speaking?

Are you afraid of public speaking? I was, until I read How to Deliver a TED Talk by Jeremy Donovan.

You see, I'm a writer. I like to write. I like sitting alone at home in a t-shirt and yoga pants with just my characters for company.

But writers have to sell books, and I hate the marketing part of it. 

Don't get me wrong: I adore my readers! But I don't want to be the kind of writer who goes on Twitter and shouts, "Buy my book!" I want the readers who want to read my books to read them because they want to read them. And then there's the whole t-shirt and yoga pants thing when it comes to author visits, vlogging, or making YouTube videos. No one wants to see that. And I'm embarrassed about the way I look, because I'm no Anne Hathaway. I'm also embarrassed by the way my voice sounds.

So what do you do in a situation like that? How do you get over your fear of putting yourself out in public?

Well, being a writer, the first thing I did was look to books for the answer. I bought Video Nation by Jefferson Graham, which is a book about creating video for the web. That turned out to be pointless, because its answer for everything is to spend hundreds and thousands of dollars on equipment. A friend recommended Talk Up Your Book by Patricia Fry, and I knew within the first few pages that was the wrong book for me, because it claims that personality sells over 80% of books. Hello, how many bestselling books have you bought from authors you've personally met? Have you met J.K. Rowling? How about James Patterson? Rick Riordan? I didn't think so. And her answer for what you do if you feel self-conscious about your weight is to lose weight. Really? Many anorexics think they're fat. So is that book saying they should lose weight? Kind of bad advice, don't you think?

So then I finally got to How to Deliver a TED Talk by Jeremy Donavan, and this book is everything a great TED Talk should be: clear, concise, easy to follow, and inspirational. This isn't just the best book on public speaking I've ever read: it's the best nonfiction book I've ever read. They say if you give a man a fish he'll eat for a day, but if you teach a man to fish he'll feed himself and his family for a lifetime. This book is the ultimate TED Talk, because it uses the TED format to teach you how to inspire others with your own ideas worth spreading.

The video review I've posted here is the first one I've made where I'm talking to the camera without feeling self-conscious because of the way I look and the way my voice sounds. Is it great? No. But I know the more I practice, the better I'll get. It's just a small step, but it's a giant leap for me. And I feel a lot better knowing it's not about selling anything. It's about sharing ideas that will improve lives. That's exactly why I write!

So thank you, thank you, thank you, Jeremy Donovan, for helping me get over my fear.

And for anyone who is afraid of public speaking, buy this book! You'll be so happy that you did.

Blog? Get a free reviewer's copy of Why My Love Life Sucks

If you blog, and you'd like a free digital reviewer's copy of my funny, teen, sci-fi novel--Why My Love Life Sucks---sign up at Xpresso Book Tours by clicking here.

This will be an all-reviews book blog tour for Why My Love Life Sucks for one week starting April 9th. Places are limited, so the sooner you sign up, the better your chances of being included. Since blogs will be linking to each other (and I'll be proudly showing off my favorite reviews here and on Facebook and tweeting excitedly about them), this could also be a chance to help you promote your own blog.

Each book blogger chosen will get a free digital copy of Why My Love Life Sucks to to review AND another digital copy to give away to one of your followers. In addition, one paperback copy and a $25 gift certificate to one of my favorite online stores, ThinkGeek, will be given out to a lucky winner during the tour! You can get a cute D&D, Princess Bride, Doctor Who, Star Wars, Star Trek, science geek, computer geek, gamer geek, comic-book geek, or all-round geek tee with that gift certificate, so what are you waiting for?

I'm so excited! (But I guess you can tell.) Sign up today, so you don't miss out, and good luck!

Have a happy Purim!

Tonight is Purim, my favorite holiday. On Purim Jews celebrate the victory of Esther and Mordechai over Haman. We read from the book of Esther, make noise when Haman's name is read, give to charity, send gifts of food to friends, and wear costumes. I found this combo hat and scarf at Claire's for a little over $4, so I knew it would be perfect for Purim. I'm a happy puppy! My daughter was Puss in Boots. 

Below are the Purim baskets ("Mishlo'ach Manot") I put together. Every year, I go with a theme. One year it was Alice in Wonderland. Another year it was Winnie the Pooh-rim. (Get it?) And yet another year I made bento boxes with things made to look like flowers, and I created a Megillah about Esther getting advice from the butterflies and bees in the king's garden.

This year I went with a summer-fun theme. You see, topsy-turvy is one of the themes of Purim, because Mordechai and Esther turned the tables on Haman, who wanted to kill all the Jews. So I turned the world over, which meant this year my Purim theme comes from sunny Australia. 

These buckets are perfect for making sandcastles on the beach. There's also a bubble sword, a jump rope and a water gun. The foods include Pirate's Booty, orange juice, marshmallows, candy necklaces, fruit salad, watermelon lollipops, tropical Mike and Ikes, Oreos, chocolate chip cookies, and more. Because I always like to include something homemade, everyone will also get a homemade pizza. 

I wish I could give you one too. 

Have a wonderful Purim! 

Love, 

Shevi

"Dammit, Jim, I’m a Writer, Not a Book Marketer!"

I’m a writer. I love everything about writing: dreaming up new stories, outlining, writing, and editing, editing, and editing some more. And I love sharing my stories with readers.

But I am not a book marketer. 

I don’t know how to sell stuff. I’m an introvert. I’m shy, and I’m modest. I hate tooting my own horn.

You can write the best book in the world, but no one
will buy it if you don't know how to market it.

So what’s an introverted, shy, and modest writer like me to do? “If you build it, he will come” only happens in fields of dreams. In reality, you can write the world’s greatest book, but no one will ever read it if they don't know it exists. You might as well have consigned it to the proverbial desk drawer. 

The reverse is also true. I've seen terrible writers sell tons of books because they are amazing salespeople. These are people who could sell anything, and books are just another product to them. Of course, I'm not one of those people. 

At least there are two things about book marketing I do know: I know how to write a good blurb, and I know how to design a great cover. Of course, both of those are step two in the process of marketing. Those things don’t matter if you can’t convince people to check out your cover or your blurb to begin with.

It’s that first step. That's the real problem for me. How do you get the right people to check my book cover and my blurb? And by “the right people,” I mean potential readers who are likely to enjoy my books; because I know that once they do check them out, the books will sell themselves. 

For example, how do I get proud geeks to check out Why My Love LifeSucks? Or how do I get girls who love fantasy novels to check out Toren the Teller's Tale? And how do I get teachers who are looking for a fun book that boosts self-esteem to combat bullying to check out Dan Quixote: Boy of Nuevo Jersey? How do I get Ride of Your Life into the hands of people who need to believe that there can be a happy ending after a deadly tragedy? 

I don't know. Do you? 

I need to think like, Gilbert Garfinkle, the hero of The Legend of Gilbert the Fixer series. I need to apply his method for fixing things to this problem I have with marketing. 

Step one, I need to break it down to its parts. And here they are:

	Pros	Cons
1. Blogging, guest blogging, and blog tours	It’s all based on writing and graphics (my strengths); I have plenty of material; I can make it specific to my books; except for paid blog tours, it’s free; I can assemble useful blogs into a nonfiction book, which I can sell. (See 8)	Who will read it? How can I get people to read it? How do I find blogs that would be interested in my books? (The Indie Book Blog Database is a good place to start: http://hampton-networks.com/) There are affordable blog tours available in certain categories (I did two Bewitching Blog Tours, one for Toren the Teller's Tale and one for Ride of Your Life, and that worked well enough for both), but some categories don’t have them. Some tours are way overpriced, and there’s no guaranty anyone will see your posts. In the end, this could be a lot of work with no return on the time (and possibly money) invested in it.
2. Goodreads, LibraryThing, and other contests	Free, except possibly the cost of printing and shipping paperbacks to "winners."	Most of the people who participate are more interested in getting something for free than in your book. A giveaway on LibraryThing of 75 e-books resulted in only one Smashwords review that can be summed up as “I want a free copy of the next book in the series.” Still, I haven’t tried Goodreads yet, so that might be worth a try.
3. Facebook and Facebook advertising	Except for advertising and promoted posts, it’s free.	I hate tooting my own horn. I don’t want to be “that writer,” the annoying one who constantly screams, “Buy my book!” on Facebook. Ugh. But I will keep up the little bits of advertising I do for $1-2 a day. I just need to experiment with tweaking those for different audiences and with different content. I also need to keep interacting with my Facebook friends and groups.
4. Twitter	Free. Fun. Hashtags make it easier to find the right audience, and I can join Twitter chats on suitable topics.	Time consuming. And once again, the squeaky wheel gets the grease (and I’m not comfortable with squeaking). Twitter is better geared for the salesman than the writer.
5. YouTube	Words and images together, two things I’m good at; another form of storytelling, which is always fun. I love storytelling in all its forms!	Time consuming when done right, and with generally very little return on time invested. I could consider Vlogging, which is less time consuming, although I don’t feel comfortable in front of the camera. Maybe getting comfortable in front of the camera is something I should work on…
6. Pinterest	Pinterest is fun.	I have no real idea how to use it for book marketing.
7. Publish a picture book	I’ve already written and illustrated a few dummies. Parents love book readings at libraries and bookstores and will buy the book for their small children. I can also do paid elementary school classroom visits.	I’ll need to redo my picture books so that they’re under 24 pages, which will make them cheaper to publish in full color. That could be a lot of work. This won’t help me sell my middle-grade and teen novels.
8. Publish an adult nonfiction book	Makes it easier to do library and bookstore visits that will attract people who will buy my  book, since you can give a helpful presentation on the topic of your book to adult book buyers. Also makes you more attractive for radio and TV interviews. You can assemble blog posts into a nonfiction book, so that would let you accomplish two things at once.	Unless the topic of the book somehow relates to your other books, this won’t sell your other books.
9. Publish a Jewish book	Like an adult nonfiction book, this will open me up to giving presentations at synagogues, Jewish schools, and JCCs. I already have a finished book based on my mom’s childhood years in Jerusalem at the time that Israel became a state, but I’d like to expand it to include the life stories of four generations of women in my family in the Holy Land. I also have a semi-autobiographical, funny, middle-grade novel about growing up in a modern orthodox Jewish family, which I've written but haven't published yet.	I don’t want to be categorized as a “Jewish author.” Yes, I’m Jewish, but I write mostly comedy, science fiction, and fantasy. This audience is unlikely to spill over to my other books. I don’t want to be pigeonholed. Plus, I'd have to spend time editing and possibly illustrating this book, which would take time away from my other books.
10. Paid advertising (Google, TV, radio, magazines, websites)	Potentially a lot of exposure	People generally tune out ads, and they’re expensive! Plus, how can you be sure it’s the right audience?
11. Become a celebrity	People will buy anything a celebrity is selling.	The easiest way to become a celebrity is by doing something humiliating. No thanks!
12. Email newsletter	Relies on writing and visuals, and only those interested in it would sign up.	People generally ignore newsletters in their email inbox. Why would they open mine? Plus I’d need to pay a service to run it properly.
13. Approach bookstores	Getting my books into bookstores would be great.	They generally won’t take indie published books. Selling them on consignment is a possibility, but I don’t know how that works. I could do an event, but that works best for picture-book reading or nonfiction presentations.
14. Approach schools and libraries	Many writers make more money from school visits than they do from book sales. I have a great school program about bullying and self-esteem for Dan Quixote, and another good one on analyzing and writing fiction for my other books.	Who do I approach, how do I approach them, and how do I convince them my presentation is worth spending more on than another writer’s?
15. Podcsasting	Similar to blogging, but with a different audience, an audience that is on the move, driving somewhere or exercising. I have the equipment, like a great microphone.	I tend to get nervous when it’s just me talking to nobody. Sometimes I cough or say things wrong. With an autistic teenager at home, there's rarely any peace and quiet. And I don’t know if I have any material for the podcast listening audience that will draw them to my books.
16. Attending fairs, conferences, and suitable conventions	Fun, and I can definitely pick the right audience for each book (Toren the Teller’s Tale for Renaissance Faires or DragonCon; Why My Love Life Sucks for Sci-Fi, Trekker Cons, and ComicCons; Dan Quixote for education conferences)	Costs a lot, and unlikely to be worth the money. (However, I might be able to get speaking engagements at some of them, and they might even pay.)

So those are the options for step one, each with its pros and cons. I guess if there were one clear easy answer, everyone would be doing it.

I hate having so many choices, particularly when every one of them has its drawbacks. Do I waste my time this way or that way? Do I embarrass myself this way or that way? Do I feel awkward and inept in this context or that context? It’s quite a predicament.

All I know is that I’d rather be writing.

So what do you think I should do? What would you do in my situation? How would you handle marketing a middle-grade or YA humorous fiction, fantasy or science-fiction novel? What do you think works, and what doesn’t? 

I hope you'll leave your thoughts in the comments below.