What actors would you cast for Why My Love Life Sucks?

Some people have fantasy football teams. Others like to imagine a dream cast for the movie or TV versions of their favorite novels. Someone asks me for my dream cast for Why My Love Life Sucks (The Legend of Gilbert the Fixer, book one), so here it is: .

Jared Gilman as Gilbert Garfinkle

The star of Moonrise Kingdom has the geeky good looks, the right voice (he’s not from New York City, but South Orange is pretty close), and is almost the right age. I can picture him spouting Gilbert’s sarcastic lines, but is he capable of being super intense, like Gilbert? So far, all his roles seem to have had him acting chill. And at 14, I think he might already be too tall. But when I saw him again in a recent commercial for Verizon, I knew he has the look I want for Gilbert. He just needs his hair curled.

Dakota Fanning as Amber

I've long loved Dakota Fanning’s acting, particularly in Charlotte’s Web and Dreamer, although she might already be too old to play the 17-year-old who will forever look like she’s 15. Or maybe not? Of course, she'd have to change her hair color and put on some weight for the role of the voluptuous Amber. It would be nice to see her in a role that lets her smile a lot, because I've seen her on late-night talk shows, and she has a beautiful smile. And she does deserve a chance to play a vampire in a series that doesn't, you know, suck.  

Anneliese van der Pol as Delilah Jones

I don’t know what it is about her, but I have the feeling that Anneliese van der Pol from Vampires Sucks and That’s So Raven could play the beautiful, bullying queen bee who will use every trick in the book to get exactly what she wants. It’s a fun and crazy role, and I think she would have a great time with it.

Ryan Lee as Dylan Barry

Ryan Lee, from Super 8, has almost exactly the right look and mannerisms I wanted for Dylan, and he’s also the right age. The one problem is that Dylan--Gilbert’s best friend--is meant to be much, much taller than Gilbert, and Ryan Lee isn't exactly tall. Not a good match for the guy who calls Gilbert “Little Dude.” Aside from that, he would be the perfect choice.

Victor Garber as Ian MacIntyre

Gilbert’s Uncle Ian is a tall, suave, sophisticated, silver-haired lawyer with incredible charm, who has always been kind to Gilbert but not so kind to those who cross him. Unlike Gilbert and Amber, I’ve only ever pictured Uncle Ian as being played by one actor. Victor Garber is exactly how I picture him, and he’s a great actor who brings so much to any role he plays.

Yvonne Strahovski as Candy Garfinkle

I loved her as Sarah Walker, the gorgeous secret agent who falls for a super geek,  in the TV series Chuck, one of the most geeking awesome action-comedy shows ever! Candy Garfinkle is pretty much the opposite of Sarah Walker, but I still think that Strahovski has the talent--and beauty--to play Gilbert’s self-absorbed, gold-digging mother without making it campy.  

Nikki SooHoo as Jenny Chen

At 24, she’s much older than Jenny, but she has exactly the look I've always pictured for the love of Gilbert’s life. Nikki SooHoo has had many small roles on TV and in the movies, including playing the main character's best friend in heaven in The Lovely Bones. She also has a gymnastics background, which could come in useful considering that Gilbert and Jenny bond over rock-climbing, aikido, and ballroom dancing.

Seth Rogen as Dungeon Master Dave

The truth? I've always pictured Kevin Smith as Dungeon Master Dave, but Dave is supposed to be about 25, and Smith is too old to play him. Seth Rogen, though, would be a perfect second choice. Yes, he’s still a little older than Dave, but Rogen captures the geeky vibe of incredible humor, intelligence and calm that is Dave.